*Mature content follows…take care when reading around young children*

Some of my older children volunteer at a medical facility that requires them to get TB tests. The health department in our county gives TB tests for $10 and does not require an appointment (versus about $100 per child and an appointment at the doctor’s office).

So off we went to the county health department.

If anyone needs any tangible proof that our society is in trouble, take them to the local health department.

Keep in mind, this is the health center where people with no insurance go for inexpensive medical care, or people with high deductibles (like us) go to get things like TB tests. It is also a resource for the financially struggling to receive free healthcare and vaccinations. These health centers serve a large, diverse group of people in many different situations.

There are various clinics in our local health department, but any minor older than 11 is required to be treated in the Teen Wellness Center. (Yes, I suspect you’re thinking what I was thinking: “I thought this would be for ‘teens,’ which means an age that ends in ‘-teen’…so why have ‘teens’ now been re-defined to include some children whose age does not end in ‘-teen’?”)

For this next part, make sure there are no small children looking over your shoulder.

All clear?

Scroll down.

In the Teen Wellness Center, on the wall immediately opposite the waiting room chairs, is this:

As you can see, the pamphlets include content on “healthy relationships,” STDs, and birth control.

I moved as quickly as possible to flip over the most offensive of the pamphlets before my teens start reading them.

However, I needn’t have bothered, because while I was paying, filling out forms, and flipping pamphlets, my children were each handed a questionnaire asking about:

  • their sexual activity
  • sexual partners
  • whether they were in a violent relationship
  • whether they regularly used birth control to avoid pregnancy and STDs
  • and about fifteen more of these types of questions

We were there for a TB test! But TB test, strep throat, or vaccinations, it does not matter…every child is handed this form.

Apparently, this is what secular society means by the phrase “Teen Wellness.”

Once we got into the treatment room (side note: each child was sent to her own separate room), these kind of posters were on the walls:

One of the posters describing different options for birth control.

I was shocked, but I was there for my children’s TB tests. So I went from treatment room to treatment room assuming I would need to sign the consent form for said TB test (it requires an injection under the skin). However, I was informed that my signature was not necessary.

I was told that the “great” thing about the Teen Clinic is that teens do not need their parents’ permission! And remember: all older than 11 years old are REQUIRED to go to the Teen Clinic–it isn’t just an option for them, but mandatory.

Yes, that’s right.

In the Teen Wellness center, teens can receive almost any “healthcare” they want without anyone else knowing. And just to be certain the “teens” get what sort of healthcare is available to them, there is a flier for the “Family Planning Clinic” which explains in a bright red, eye-catching box (underlines and caps are not mine, but verbatim from the flier): “no matter what–ALL SERVICES ARE CONFIDENTIAL–REGARDLESS OF YOUR AGE! Parents are not required to be involved.”

For our family, this was a teaching opportunity, but I pray for the girls who were waiting there alone (or with a boyfriend).

On the drive home, I told my teenagers how sad and angry I was. How sad it was that young girls did not know about God’s plan for their lives and their fertility. How sad it is that our society believes that setting girls up to be sexually used and discarded by men is a good thing. Worse still, as a result of the behavior they encourage, other children could be conceived…and then more “healthcare” could be provided which could result those lives being simply…discarded.

Nowhere in that Teen Clinic was there any pamphlet or sign that encouraged young people to wait for marriage, to learn about their worth and dignity, nor was there any acknowledgement of the pain and sadness that girls and boys suffer as a result of a lack of chastity.

I wish that I could say that what goes on in my conservative southern county is unusual. Sadly, it is not, and Catholic parents need to have their eyes wide open about the secular world their children today inhabit.

As parents, we have a small period when they still live at home, but are old enough to begin to understand the truth about human sexuality. As parents, it is our job to teach them about their God-given sexuality, about the beauty of their changing bodies, and about the inherent dignity they possess as children of God.

But there’s no denying it…human sexuality is difficult to discuss with children. We want our children to be informed, but we don’t want them to lose their innocence or purity of mind. To be completely honest, I have never felt completely comfortable talking about it, and thus have had to find books to help me teach it.

There is a certain delicacy with which the topic should be broached. Out of many resources I’ve found over the years, The Joyful Mysteries of Life contains the most delicate and beautiful explanation on the “facts of life” that I have ever read.

This book was written by Catholic parents to help other Catholic parents introduce human sexuality to their pre-teen children. It is designed to be used with parent and child as a team; each chapter is only a couple of pages long, and is followed by questions that can be answered and discussed together.

I have loved this book ever since I opened it over a decade ago. For example, in Chapter 1, the author describes how the baby’s first cradle (the womb) is “a very soft little cradle which God, our creator . . . gives to each girl, so that if, one day, she becomes a mother, she can cradle her baby for nine months of his life before he is born.” How wonderful and poetic!

The book goes on to cover a lot of ground, using specific details without being graphic or shocking.

It only takes ten minutes to read each chapter, making it easy for the parent to review the chapter before their child reads it (or to read it together). As it is written by Catholic parents, every chapter also discusses one of the Joyful Mysteries, as well the Blessed Virgin Mary and St. Joseph’s roles as as examples of true masculinity and femininity.  

Topics in The Joyful Mysteries of Life include:

  • Menstruation
  • Vocation of women as mothers or religious
  • The role of fathers and the vocation of men
  • Marriage and sacrifice
  • Girl’s and boy’s purity and why it’s important to protect
  • Temptation (a must-read)
  • What to do when someone fails to keep their purity (an important topic)
  • God’s forgiveness (a VERY important topic!)
  • The freedom that comes from following God’s laws

However, as good as The Joyful Mysteries of Life is, it does not address all the issues involving sexual immorality that plague us today.

For that I have found another book, Made this Way. This is not an academic book but rather a common sense explanation of the moral dilemmas that are all around us.

First, this book is worth buying for the quick, common-sense explanations it gives on natural law. However, Made this Way also discusses every moral issue of our times, from sex outside of marriage, same sex marriage, and divorce, to contraception, abortion, reproductive technologies, modesty, pornography, gender identity, and homosexuality.

Best of all, each topic is given a thorough and practical explanation of what the church teaches and how to explain it to your children, regardless of age. Made this Way has one section with an explanation for little kids and another section for big kids. All of this is covered in under 250 pages, making it a great, manageable book for busy parents.

Sometimes I am saddened at the topics I must discuss with my children. But I must.

You must, too.

The alternative – remaining silent – would leave them completely vulnerable to all the distortions of the true meaning of human sexuality.

These two books are a godsend; as Catholic parents, it is our God-given duty to teach our kids about the beauty of God’s design for sexuality, and how true freedom lies in the safeguarding of that gift.

Mary, Mother most pure, Mother most chaste…Pray for Us!

PS We have other excellent books on parenting and purity here on our website.

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